What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Why do men like to suck another man’s dick?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Make Nazis afraid again!

While you sleep, these bugs throw a party on your face - East Idaho News

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Do you think Lady Gaga and Celine Dion have rehearsed separately for their performance at the Olympics opening ceremony?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Why was the rock band Kiss so successful?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why would a girl not want you to know she has a crush on you?

TEXT:

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Musk-Trump Spat Hits New High As Musk’s Ex Piles On - HuffPost

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

You hold the door open for a lady and she stops in her tracks and screams at you, ‘Don’t hold the door for me! I’ll get it myself!’ What are your feelings or immediate reaction?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Risk Of Dengue Fever Is Just Another Reason Cruises Suck - Jalopnik

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

10 Must-See Movies at the 2025 Tribeca Festival - IndieWire

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Study Says If You're Over 50, Taking This Vitamin May Help You Live Longer - AOL.com

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

NYC summer stargazing seasons kicks off with triangle, meteor showers - Gothamist

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …